Wednesday, July 13, 2011

And the reason I can't focus on anything for more than three and a half seconds is...

not my fault!!!!!

Really, it's not! I thought it was just me being moody. Distracted. Interested in too many things. Guilted into too many other things.

But there's a real, live, actual reason why focusing and I are not BFFs.

My medication!!!!!

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh," you say. "Now it all makes sense."

Yes, yes it does all make sense now and while I am pleased to know that my flightiness is not my fault, it does not please me one bit that I still have to find a way to work with it.

For example... my novel. I open it up. I scroll through it for perhaps 47 seconds. I walk away.

Card-making. I find a design to emulate. I flip through my small-ish collection of over-priced but super-cute paper. I spread out several pieces on my desk. I walk away.

Laundry. I walk into the guest room (aka clean laundry dump room). I fold three wash clothes precisely. (Because my linen cabinet is friendly with Martha Stewart's linen cabinet, I like everything to be exact. Just in case Martha ever comes on the Linen Line.) I shake out a shirt or two of Scott's. I walk away.

Even when I'm in the bookstore, I get... bored. *gasp* *shudder* *shielding of the face in horror* I know. It's terrible, isn't it?

But despite the lack of focus and the mild restless leg syndrome, my mood has stabilized and I'm sleeping relatively normally. (Yay!!!!!!!!) The benefits of the meds out muscle the annoyances and I will befriend my unfortunate focal-less-ness.

What was I saying again? (LOL)

1 comment:

Kidsncats said...

Yep, I'm living in the same world you are, but you are right that the benefits outweigh the costs. I will take lack of focus any day over debilitating anxiety. Just went up a tad more on mine, still trying to find the dose that works well enough but doesn't make me 'ADHD'....I have several friends I see regularly who have promised to tell me when I start babbling crap and when I seem like I'm 'pinging' all over the place, so I can adjust downward on the dose. Wish it was an exact science...